We live in the greatest nation on Earth.
Our holy founding fathers gave this land birth.
But one democradaddy stands above the rest.
Our first president. Man, he was the best!

Always told the truth, ever since he was a boy.
Honest to a fault, sometime he’d annoy.
Chopped a cherry tree down, with a little axe.
But when questioned, he only gave facts.

That’s the kinda person, he was inside,
Someone you could trust to turn the war tide.
Remarkably gifted at making the kill.
That’s the best way to get on a dollar bill.

Ol’ Washington died for your sins and mine.
In stockings and a wig, damn, he look so fine!
Musket in hand, he crossed the river Delaware.
Stared the redcoats down, gave ‘em one hella scare!

They tried to resist, but soon they would fall.
My man, G-Wash, disposed of them all.
Like King Leonidas fighting Persians in burkas.
In no uncertain terms, he yelled, “THIS IS ‘MURICA!”